You don't know me

Most of you who are reading this don't know me at all in real life.  Some of you who are my facebook friends have seen photos of me, my children, my holidays and so have a feeling that you know me somewhat.  But, there is so much about me that is not really known...is only 'known' based on what I say.  I say I am single - but how do you know?  Have you seen this acknowledged by people that you know for sure know me well, live in my city, know my family?  I say I am an accountant?  But how do you know?  From photos that I have posted of my office?  That does not say that I am an accountant...it just says that I work in an office.  Or perhaps just that I visit an office sometimes.

The fact is, people just don't know who they are dealing with online.  We can chat, we can talk on the phone.  Even meet.  But, unless we know someone in their 'regular' life, we can be sure of nothing.  I know this for a fact.  I have seen people with apparently full profiles, including photos of their house inside and out (large, three story with extensive grounds), of dogs, of the orchard they owned, with a job as an investment banker, and with extensive travel behind them.  Now, I have a very good memory.  And, perhaps due to my profession, am very awake to inconsistencies.  I saw a few, I probed.  Turns out none of this was true - the guy in question had not travelled as he said...did not live in the 3 story house but rather in a 1BK...and worked in a caryard.  None of these bad points in themselves...but they became so due to his deception.  And they impacted very negatively on some others.  One girl, that went from the US to India to meet him, but was shocked to find the truth that emerged under her Uncle's questioning.  Another,that had met him when visiting family from Canada, not only believed that she would be marrying him, but sent money to his 'sister' to buy him a gift after his terrible motorcycle accident (all lies, the email account of the sister was actually another identity of his).  So, it shows just how far and for how long people can be deceived.

I am not saying that I am not who I say I am.  But, I am asking you to consider just how much you know me. Photos of children and of me or, perhaps, of an unsuspecting friend or stranger, can easily be obtained from Picasa, flickr, photobucket or the huge number of websites that provide stock images.  A character can be feigned.  I tell people that I travel, that I work hard.  Perhaps I am on welfare and actually bitterly jealous of those who do.  Perhaps I see some of you as more fortunate...and want your money.  Perhaps I see some of you as 'hot' and want your body.  Or maybe I am just looking for acceptance and respect that I could never find in my real persona.  But, you just don't know.

Maybe now you will start checking me out.  On different websites.  By google search.  Searching by username, searching by email if you know it.  Checking the posts on my blog to see if there appears to be any comments by people who know me 'in real life'.  Checking my facebook to see if there are neighbours, friends from school, family.  That it is not just a list of people I found through groups or friend suggestions, or other connections.  Whether people on my friends list are tagged in my photos.  Do it.  Please.  Do it before trusting me with your facebook friendship beyond limited.  Do it especially if you plan to meet me.

I am not saying people on the net are generally bad.  I am just saying, please be careful.

The trigger for this - I see this guy back on facebook...he has an open profile.  Once more, he is adding NRI girls from North America.  I can't warn them.  But I can warn you.  All is not necessarily as it seems.